The Best Fit for One Family

2012 photo Joy“Baby Sign Language is all the rage nowadays!” I exclaimed to myself as I finalized my order on Amazon.ca for Baby Sign Language books and DVDs. I was six months pregnant, and like any other new (and nervous!) mother, I had spent massive amounts of time on an endless quest for information, tips, and latest trends in parenting. I aspired to raise an imaginative and articulate child, and often fantasized of someday having a conversation with my toddler where he or she would tell me stories about their day at preschool, and I was especially looking forward to hearing the ones drawn from the imagination. All my research seemed to suggest the same concept to “Introduce language to your child at an early age.” So it was then that I made the decision to commit to ensuring that my child would be in a language enriched environment, be it spoken or visual.
My DVDs and books had finally come in, I was excited! About five minutes into watching my first DVD, I was already confused. The woman on the television seemed to just be making random hand gestures, and I thought to myself, “This is all supposed to mean something?!” I made sure I knew the basics… “Milk,” “Diaper,” “Bath,” “More,” and “Sleep.” I felt that was enough visual language to let my child know I was making an effort to communicate. Besides, I thought that making sure that I constantly spoke to my child would still be promoting a language enriched environment. Alas, like any other impulse online purchase, the books and DVDs collected dust.
Early Halloween morning, Teanna was born, and she instantly had me wrapped around her tiny little finger. Yes, I was smitten, and I wanted to give her the world. She was a tiny girl, yet in spite of her petiteness, it was already apparent that she had a big and captivating personality. Even as an infant, she seemed to be extremely observant, her eyes wide, a naturally curious expression, and her head constantly turning as if to absorb everything going on in her surroundings. I spoke, sang, and signed the very limited amount of signs I knew with my daughter. She smiled and giggled no matter what I did, she was a happy child, and I, a sleep deprived but nevertheless happy mom. At 8 months old, she signed “diaper,” and when checked, had actually needed a diaper change. I was floored, to say the very least – my child was communicating! At 10 months, she had learned to sign “sleep,” and I would have to gloatingly say that bedtime was always such a breeze. I loved her, and I was happy, but there was a part of me that felt like there was something that was not quite right.
By the time Teanna had turned a year old, she was happy and healthy as ever. However, there still seemed to be some sort of disconnect, a gnawing feeling, if you will. I have had suspicions regarding her hearing since she was born, and it was not until she was 19 months old that she was officially diagnosed to have been profoundly Deaf in both ears. It was a rough and emotional experience, and not only had I felt like I was mourning the loss of something very important, but I was also lost as to what to do next. It was an overwhelming time, filled with so much information from a multitude of resources. It was a time for life-altering and time sensitive decision making, and frankly, I had begun to feel so numb from it all, that it felt like I was simply being carried along the chain of events.
Teanna had immediately gotten fitted for hearing aids, and I felt it was the best decision to choose an intervention program where both a Sign Language Instructor and Speech Language Pathologist would be available. Having an actual instructor for American Sign Language (ASL) made learning it easier. I discovered just how visual the language is, as most of the signs are reminiscent of the English word definition. It definitely was not just a “bunch of random gestures” made in an effort to convey a thought. ASL is an actual language, with grammatical rules that needed to be followed. As much as I found the learning process enjoyable, it took some time for me to feel comfortable using it, even with the instructor. However, as unnatural as it felt, I knew that it would benefit my daughter, so I made an effort to sign with her as much as I could when it was just the two of us. There were many aspects of ASL where I felt slightly awkward. One example being the use of very pronounced, almost exaggerated facial expressions. Raised eyebrows when asking a yes or no question, a furrowed one when asking one that needed a more detailed reply. Pursed lips when describing something that is small, and saying “cha!” with eyes wide to describe something large. It was a time of adjustment.
As with most languages, ASL was accompanied by a culture of its own, the Deaf Culture. Throughout my journey, I have come to learn that Deafies are a very warm and welcoming bunch. I was noticing Deaf people everywhere! I would muster up the courage to approach them in restaurants, at the mall, and I had even found a church that had a Deaf ministry. I had mastered signing, “Hi, my name is Joy. I saw you signing, are you Deaf? I have a daughter who is Deaf, and I am learning Sign Language very slowly.” When a Deaf person sees you making an effort to communicate in their language, their eyes light up, and they are more than willing to sign extra slowly, or even try and speak to have a conversation with you. It was a great feeling when I saw that I, a hearing person, could have a sensible conversation with a Deaf person. In the Deaf Culture there is Deaf Pride, which states that a Deaf person can do anything except hear. I found the culture to be extremely interesting, and begun to immerse myself in it at my own time. I read books, articles, and websites – I wanted to be educated, after all, this IS my daughter’s culture.
Teanna received a Cochlear Implant in her right ear in the Winter of 2009. She currently goes to a preschool where both Deaf children, and children of Deaf adults (CODA’s) attend. In school, the teachers both sign and speak. She receives Speech Therapy every day, and is showing steady progress, as she is currently babbling and making great efforts to speak certain words. She is also recognizing various words that she hears. Her Sign Language skills continue to impress me, she is becoming quite fluent, and at times I feel like I am starting to trail behind. Through Sign Language I can see that she is clever. “I want juice, please,” she asked me one day. “I don’t have juice for you right now, just water,” was my reply. She held up a grape that she was snacking on and signed, “Ok, there is juice inside the grape,” then ran off to play. Through Sign language I can see that she has a sense of humour, she jokes around and I know what types of things she finds funny. Currently she has many imaginative stories involving slapstick comedy. Through Sign Language she is able to voice her emotions, recall past events, and express what she hopes to do in the future.
Personally, the decision to give my daughter a combination of the Cochlear Implant, speech, and American Sign Language is what works for us. There is no doubt that it keeps the calendar pretty full, but it also poses plenty of perks. Teanna will be bilingual, and I feel that she is able to receive the best of what being Deaf and hearing has to offer. Growing up, I lived an expatriate childhood, and I would constantly be reminded that it is important to “remember my roots.” I believe that the decision to educate and involve ourselves with Deaf Culture is giving my daughter a solid foundation as to who and what she is. It is a fact that I am raising a Deaf child in a world that is predominantly hearing. Being involved in the Deaf Community gives her a sense of belonging, and surrounds her with people with whom she shares something in common. I believe it is this involvement that will give her a strong sense of self, thus giving her the confidence to venture out into the hearing world. Teanna will be faced with having to make various decisions about her life as an adult. With the foundation that I am laying out for her, I strongly believe that I am giving her all the tools she may need, no matter which path she chooses. I too, am preparing myself to be in a position to support her decisions. When she was born and I held her for the first time, I knew I wanted to give her the world… Now, she has both the Deaf and hearing worlds at her fingertips.

Posted in Families to Families, Newsletter - Sept 2011, Newsletters | Comments Off on The Best Fit for One Family

The Best Fit for One Family – Simplified Chinese 最适合我家庭的抉择

by Joy Santos

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This translation is made possible with the generous donation of the Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation.

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The Best Fit for One Family – Punjabi Translation

Screen Shot 2012-10-05 at 11.36.32 AM

by Joy Santos

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The Best Fit for One Family – Traditional Chinese 最適合我家庭的抉擇

by Joy Santos

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This translation is made possible with the generous donation of the Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation. 承蒙 Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation 慷慨捐助,文章得以翻譯成中文。

 

 
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Fun in the Sun! End-of-Summer Informal Get-Together

A great chance to socialize and catch up! Wading pool and playground – bring a picnic lunch and blanket. Cancelled if it rains.

Grimston Park in New Westminster – 19th St. at 7th Ave.
Look for the orange and blue balloons.

www.newwestpcr.ca/parks/community_parks/grimston_park.php

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Hard of Hearing Teenaged Fiddler Travels to Scotland

By Teresa Kazemir

Our son Jesse traveled to Scotland this past summer – he is a  fiddle player with the North Shore Celtic Ensemble, and they  participated in the Aberdeen International Youth Festival for  12 days in July and August.  It was an intense, exciting experience for the  20 teens that went – they all had a fantastic, if  exhausting,  time.

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Jesse is hard of hearing and wears two Bone Anchored Hearing Aids (BAHAs), so there were a few things to consider when  planning the trip.  For one thing, we made sure the chaperones knew that he would not wake up in case of fire, as he  would not hear the alarm.  Chaperones and other kids in his  flat were told that in the case of a fire, someone would have  to go into his room and wake him, and so Jesse made a point  of not locking his door when he was sleeping.  In fact, even  though he has a vibrating alarm clock, Jesse tends to fall back  to sleep after it wakes him up (teenage boys can really  sleep ), so there were a few occasions when his friends had  to wake him up for breakfast.   

Jesse also made a point of packing his dry aid kit – we have  found that in some places the air is more humid (especially if  we are camping and staying in a tent), and that causes problems with his hearing aids.  Storing the aids in the dry aid kit  each night helps with this.  Jesse also took it in case his hearing aids got wet – it rains a fair bit in Scotland.    

One security guard questioned Jesse about his hearing aids  when going through security at the airport.  Jesse is quite  practiced at talking to people about his hearing aids and hearing loss, and once he explained, they did not hassle him any  further.  I think it helped that Jesse was not at all defensive,  and was quite happy to explain.

There were some situations during the trip where Jesse found  it difficult to hear – he managed OK in the cafeteria, but the  cabarets we attended each night (where different groups performed for each other) were VERY loud.  It was so loud that  no one could hear, though, so Jesse was not alone.   

Jesse also found that each concert venue where they  performed was different, and there were a few places  where he had a hard time hearing the guitar (which is  critical when you are playing as part of an ensemble,  and the guitar sets and maintains the beat).  The musical directors of the group are very respectful and  understanding about Jesse’s hearing loss, but they  don’t necessarily know when Jesse is having a hard  time hearing. It’s his responsibility to let them know,  and then they make any necessary adjustments. When Jesse was new to the group, he was hesitant to  speak up, but as his confidence has grown, he has  become much better at advocating for his listening  needs.  There were two or three times this trip when  he was able to adjust where he stood so he could  btter hear the guitar through the monitor on stage.

Another challenge was the fact that participants  came from all over the world.  Many people spoke  English, but with a whole variety of accents.  This  typically presents a challenge for people with hearing  loss, but Jesse actually found that he could understand most accents quite well.  He did struggle with the flight attendants from Air France, who had very  strong French accents.  He found he used the same  strategies as everyone else – listening carefully, asking the person to repeat, or asking a friend for clarification.

Overall, Jesse’s hearing loss did not really cause many  problems for him on this trip. Preparing ahead of  time definitely helped (talking with chaperones, packing the dry aid kit).  The challenges a person encoun* ters when travelling certainly vary from person to  person, depending on their hearing loss and other  factors, but one key strategy is to be proactive and be  prepared.   Other than that, perhaps the best tool is a  sense of humour – a smile and a laugh certainly help  to smooth things over when an instruction is missed  or something is misheard.

As a parent (and chaperone) it was really good to see  how independent Jesse has become, and how he can  use strategies to compensate for things he might be  missing.  I have chaperoned on several trips over the  years (ensemble trips and school trips) and have  found it to be a wonderful way to help the other kids,  teachers, leaders and parents learn more about  Jesse’s hearing loss.  There are oUen nice, natural  opportunities for people to ask me questions that  they’ve never quite got around to asking.   So, Scotland was great, Jesse now has the ”travel  bug”…and I am confident that his hearing loss will not  hold him back.

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Posted in Families to Families, Newsletter - Apr 2011 | Comments Off on Hard of Hearing Teenaged Fiddler Travels to Scotland

Spring Picnic at Clayton Community Hall

Our third Annual Spring Picnic will be another opportunity to meet other families with children who are deaf or hard of hearing, ages 0-5.

Saturday, May 28th 11:00 am to 2:00 pm

Clayton Community Hall (on 70th Avenue near 184th Street in Surrey)

(click for map)

  • Meet at the shelter near the playground – look for the blue & orange balloons!
  • Bring the whole family and a potluck dish to share (beverages will be provided).
  • Don’t forget your blankets & lawn chairs. We will move into the hall in case of rain.
  • Fun for the kids! Face painting, crafts, parachute games, races & playground.

Please RSVP by Wednesday, May 25th to info@bchandsandvoices.com or phone us at 604-552-2254. Please include your names, the age(s) of your child/children, and what you would like to bring.

For those that live outside the Lower Mainland, We have a grant from BC Children’s Hospital to help pay your travel expenses to come to our event!  It will not cover flights, but would certainly help with ferry fares, gas, etc.  Please contact us to find out more details.

Download a printable version of this announcement

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Blossoming in Kindergarten – Punjabi Translation

CaitlinBy Jennifer Towers

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This translation is made possible with the generous donation of the Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation.

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Blossoming in Kindergarten – Traditional Chinese 琪蓮(Caitlin)在幼稚園的進展

CaitlinBy Jennifer Towers

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This translation is made possible with the generous donation of the Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation.

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Blossoming in Kindergarten – Simplified Chinese 琪莲(Caitlin)在幼稚园的进展

CaitlinBy Jennifer Towers

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This translation is made possible with the generous donation of the Gwyn Morgan & Patricia Trottier Foundation.

Posted in Newsletter - Apr 2011, Newsletters, Simplified Chinese 简体中文 | Comments Off on Blossoming in Kindergarten – Simplified Chinese 琪莲(Caitlin)在幼稚园的进展
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