BC Hands & Voices

By Joy Santos

The Bilingual-Bicultural educational approach for Deaf children is one where the child uses American Sign Language (ASL) as their first language, and English as their second. This is also known as the Bi-Bi approach, and it is often mentioned around the Deaf Community. While different approaches work for different children, this has been our family’s preferred approach for my daughter, Teanna, in both her home and school life. I would like to take this opportunity to share some of the reasons why I have found it to be of benefit to us.

Teanna was born deaf, and received a cochlear implant at age two. She is now in Grade 4 at the Provincial School for the Deaf, where she receives instruction primarily in ASL. Advantages of the Bi-Bi approach with regards to Deaf education are that children receive instruction in a language that is highly accessible to them, they are immersed in their culture, and are surrounded by native users of ASL who can also serve as positive role models. Teanna participates in classes such as Deaf Culture studies, and I feel that this helps her learn and understand more about her identity as a Deaf person. This learning environment also encourages students to promote self-advocacy, and learn about prominent moments in Deaf History. I find this particular approach to her learning to be very empowering.

The curriculum has been superb with accommodating each student’s individual needs, and I feel that personal goals unique to each family can be discussed in depth during one-on-one Individual Education Plan* meetings during the school year. During these sessions, teachers and families collaborate with common educational objectives, and it is where I typically express my desire for Teanna to obtain fluency in both spoken and written English.

Infant and toddler’s brains are primed to learn and absorb languages, whether it is in visual or spoken form. As an Early Childhood Educator, I have learned about, and witnessed firsthand, a multitude of advantages to raising a bilingual child. These can include:

• Cognitive Benefits
  • Bilingual brains seem to be able to multitask more efficiently.
  • The skill of reading seems to be acquired easier by bilingual children.
  • The concept of abstract thinking and problem solving seem to be understood more clearly by bilingual children.
• Cultural Benefits
  • Bicultural children have an awareness that various cultures and languages exist. This could potentially encourage socialization with peers who may or may not speak their language, and also promote tolerance.
  • Being aware of other languages and cultures, and feeling comfortable in different environments is an asset in our increasingly globalized world.

Generally speaking, our choice to incorporate the use of both ASL and spoken/written English into our daily lives certainly reaps multiple benefits, as both have been useful in various settings.

With ASL, it makes communicating from a distance, in noisy environments, or through physical barriers, such as a window, so much easier. I am also rest-assured that Teanna and I will be able to communicate even if her Cochlear Implant gets misplaced, runs out of batteries, or breaks down – or if it simply needs to be left at home when we go to the lake or plan on riding roller coasters at a theme park.

With English, she is able to confidently communicate with people who are not fluent in ASL, and can even teach ASL to them! A fun fact about Teanna is that she aspires to someday become a singer and songwriter. Her knowledge of English allows her to write songs, and it is very endearing for me to see her independence in taking action to pursue a dream of hers.

Most importantly, the Bi-Bi approach provides her with the freedom to choose which works best for her in any given moment. There are days where she has chosen not to use her cochlear implant, and tells me “Mom, I want a quiet day today, please sign if you want to talk to me.” There have also been days where she will say “Mom, let’s chat so I can practice English,” and she will take the initiative to ask me about English grammar and pronunciation of some words. Her ability to code-switch has always amazed me!

One of the most crucial points that I have learned thus far in my role as a parent of a Deaf child, is the importance of providing our children with options for themselves. With regards to language, I remember constantly hearing “facts” or “statistics” that viewed the Bi-Bi approach as detrimental to successful language development, and it was therefore discouraged. On the contrary, though, there has also been a lot of research done to prove that children’s brains are like sponges, and they will take in and utilize what is made available to them.

While there is no one “right way” to teach all deaf and hard of hearing children, I see proof of the strengths of the Bi-Bi approach in my daughter. This extends beyond her proficiency in both ASL and English, to expanding her interest to learn about the world around her. She is keen to learn about different cultures, and wants to travel and learn more languages (both oral and sign) from other countries. Her disposition to take the world by storm is inspiring!
* When a deaf/hard of hearing child transitions to school, the plan developed and followed through by their team progresses from an Individual Family Service Plan (IFSP) to an Individual Education Plan (IEP).

By Anja Rosenke

When I was growing up, my dad napped every evening after work. Some dads maybe poured themselves a drink, some perhaps watched the evening news, but my dad rested. Every night, same time, same spot. Family jokes still abound about the permanent depression in the cushions in ‘his’ spot on the couch. Back then, our hopes would sink each evening as he settled in on the couch, because that meant we wouldn’t be allowed to watch the lineup of sassy sitcoms that filled the evening TV schedule. We looked forward to seeing what funny antics Jack Tripper and Mr Roper would get up to, but my dad hated the canned laugh-tracks on those glitzy shows. In those days, there was only one TV in the house, and it was positioned very inconveniently directly across from said couch. Enough said.

On some level we were aware that our dad napped because of his strenuous, even exhausting work. He went to work each day with hammers, levels, and planes in his tool belt, but I would argue that those evening naps were an even more important tool for him. He recognized that his job was stressful and taking time in the evenings to decompress helped him deal with it each day. Only as an adult have I have come to understand the value of what he did for himself back then.

Most of us are aware that we need to have a few tools in our parenting toolbox to help us do the sometimes challenging job of raising successful, happy, well-adjusted, and amazing kids. Wait, who am I kidding – sometimes we need tools just to get us through one day! Well, as parents of deaf and hard of hearing kids, I think we need those tools at the ready even more so. Inevitably, there are points along the journey of raising our successful, happy, well-adjusted, amazing deaf and hard of hearing children that can be especially stressful or challenging. Many parents are first faced with this when their child’s hearing loss is identified. But challenging and emotional times can arise from all sorts of situations: navigating the transition into preschool or elementary school, guiding a child through a social falling out with friends, adjusting to a change in teacher or therapist, or facing a further drop in hearing levels. It’s times like these when we all need some solid tools to help us cope, and to see ourselves, our children, and our families through.

Community is one of the most important tools in my toolbox. Sharing your experiences, your fears and concerns, your joys and successes with someone who has ‘walked a mile in your shoes’ can be powerful, validating and uplifting. A German proverb that I heard often growing up translates as “a shared burden is half the burden”. I truly believe this. Come to think of it, this tool comes straight out of my mom’s toolbox. She came to Canada as a newlywed speaking little English, having left behind her family and friends to build a new life here with her husband. Growing up, we would often find her sitting at the kitchen table with a friend, heads together, coffee mugs in hand. She sought out community. Similarly, I find that turning to another parent of a deaf or hard of hearing child means turning to someone who understands. Over the past eight years of my journey as the parent of a deaf/hard of hearing child, I have found that no matter where you live in the world, what language you use to communicate, or what your family circumstances – you share common ground.

Another important tool for me is exercise. The problem is that even though I know it works, I don’t always make time for it. This one didn’t come from either of my parents, but was one that I discovered for myself as an adult. Exercise simply makes me feel good. Call it an endorphin rush, a runner’s high or an outlet for frustration, there is a physiological response to getting your heart rate up and your blood pumping. Now, I’m not suggesting that anyone stop reading and give me fifty pushups, but making time for a bit of movement, some fresh air and a change of scenery is always a good idea. Unfortunately, many people – myself included – tend to put exercise on the back burner when life gets busy and stress levels rise. Ironically, it is one of the best ways to help deal with that pressure and stress. The sport and exercise psychologist, Dr. Kip Matthews, explains it well: “exercise affords the body an opportunity to practice responding to stress, streamlining the communication between the systems involved in the stress response. The less active we become, the more challenged we are in dealing with stress.”¹

Writing has always been a go-to for me, and even as a young child I remember getting a lot of satisfaction from putting pen to paper. I journaled for years at home and on trips abroad, and as an angst-filled teenager I even tried my hand at poetry! That didn’t last but I feel fortunate to have put this “tool” in my toolbox early on in life, and it continues to serve me well. Nonetheless, with the busy pace of family life, I need to remind myself that it is there for me to call upon. It does me a world of good to simply get my thoughts down on paper. I do this in various ways – for one, when it seems like all we talk about at my son’s school are his “stretches”, I try to take note of the clever, funny, interesting things he says and does at home with his broad vocabulary and vivid imagination. I have been doing this for years, and from time to time I sit down with my son and share these anecdotes and quotes with him. He gets to see himself the way that I see him: amazing and unique, full of strength and resilience.

I admit, I find it a challenge sometimes to see the forest through the trees, especially when it feels like the trees are closing in. At times I feel as though I experience my son’s highs and lows, successes and stumbles as if they were my own. This can be heart-stopping and gut-wrenching, exhilarating and joyous all at once. I don’t know if it’s healthy, but that’s the way it is for me. I often need to remind myself of the tools that I have in my toolbox, to dust them off and put them to good use. They help me to weather and sometimes even thrive in the turbulent times.

So whether you write or draw, talk or exercise your stress away, the important thing is that you figure out what tools work for you. Once you discover them, place them in your own personal toolbox to draw from when you need. Above all, every parent of a deaf or hard of hearing child should know that there are always moms and dads out there – be it online, at a Hands & Voices coffee night, or through your early intervention agency – who are going through or have already experienced something similar to you. At the very least, they can lend an open ear. And who knows, by reaching out, you may be giving them an important tool to put in their own toolbox.

Footnote

¹ http://dailyburn.com/life/fitness/what-are-endorphins-runners-high/

By Jen Gow

Kim Sanderson recently spoke to ‘the power of your story’ at the annual Parent Workshop that was co-hosted by BC Hands & Voices, Guide by Your Side, CHAA BC Parent’s Branch and the Family Network for Deaf Children. It’s perhaps no surprise that her presentation was brilliant; Kim’s a communications consultant in her professional life, after all. Like a great movie, it was more than just entertaining – I found it really engaging and thought provoking.

Kim spoke to the influence parents have on the core values our deaf and hard of hearing (d/hh) children live their lives by. As the mother of two adults, an older hearing daughter and a younger profoundly deaf son, she has the voice of 30 years of experience. Kim summarized her 30 years of experience, and included her 10 top parenting tips. Reflections on her own journey as a parent with her deaf son, family, and community offer rich food for thought.

Editing your original life plan

By her own admission, Kim is an organizer, and when she was younger she set out a plan for her life. It outlined her ambitions for her personal and professional life, down to the type of person she’d marry and the number of children she wanted. Things were coming along quite nicely until she found out her younger child was deaf – this certainly hadn’t been written into the plan!

Like many of us, Kim didn’t know anyone who was deaf. Negative stereotypes filled the void of positive role models. Confusion, sadness, disappointment and fearfulness soon followed but Kim quickly realized that she faced a choice at this point. She could either refuse to accept this change to her plan, or she could accept it and create a new one.

Looking back, Kim has great clarity and confidence when she says that embracing these changes made to her original plan have greatly enriched her life. But she also acknowledges that it didn’t always feel like that, and that it didn’t always come easily.

You are your child’s mirror

As a new mother, Kim worried that she wouldn’t always be there for her children so she wrote letters to their future selves. These letters contained the words that she spoke to her children at the time, and these flashes from the past now offer up a treasure trove of insight.

So what was Kim telling her young deaf child? When he was two, she wrote that he was smart, intelligent and athletic. Now he is a web designer, and a competitive athlete at national and international levels! Similarly, when Kim saw her son in the BC Early Hearing Program ‘Nice to Meet You’ film (which showcases young d/hh adults) she was struck by the way he mirrored the positive language and messages his dad and Kim had used since he was a small boy.

Watching the rest of this film, Kim realized that this projection of a parent’s messages to their children wasn’t limited to her own family. Kim has known many of the young adults in this film since they were babies, and was struck by their family stories of positive reinforcement too. She recalled one parent always speaking to the importance of reading, and her children speak to the importance of literature; another family’s core value centered around communication, regardless of the mode, and their child speaks of the importance of communicating with our children and immersing them in language; another parent was very at ease and accepting of her son’s hearing loss from the very start, and the son speaks of his comfort with his hearing loss.

We are always told that we are our children’s biggest teacher but sometimes it can be hard to see our influence in the incremental changes from day to day. This fast-forward glimpse into the past and present of d/hh young adults was a striking way to see the huge influence that families’ core values have on children’s attitude and outcomes.

Your attitude determines your altitude

Drawing from her own childhood memories, Kim reminded us that this influence can be negative as well as positive, and that it can deeply affect the life choices of our children. We exercise this power not only in our everyday actions but also in the language we use. However, we don’t live in a bubble, and many others people will also hold sway over our children.

Our d/hh children might pick up negative messages from others that can potentially block their progress. Of course, as parents we want to protect our children from those ‘you can’t do that’ moments but when they come up we can advocate, not just to resolve, but also to model for our children. We can’t be with them all the time, though, so just as importantly we must teach them to fly. As I step forward into my daily life, I’m taking Kim’s adage with me: your attitude determines your altitude.

______________________________________________________________

If you have any questions for Kim, you can reach her at consultantmanyhats (at) gmail.com.